Foot Regiments of Ober-Bindlestiff

1/Intendant General M4,PT,EP,EFD
2/Intendant General M4,PT,EP,EFD
1/Blesois M4,PT,EP,EFD
2/Blesois M4,PT,EP,EFD
Royal Boullibaise M4,PT,EP,EFD
1/1st Germans M4,PT,NE,EFD
2/1st Germans M4,PT,NE,EFD
1/2nd Germans M4,PT,NE,EFD
2/2nd Germans M4,PT,NE,EFD
3rd Germans M4,PT,NE,EFD
1/Chef de Fer M4,PT,EP,EFD
2/Chef de Fer M4,PT,EP,EFD
Provisionaire Genl M4,PT,EP,EFD
Procurer General M4,PT,EP,EFD
La Vielle Putain M4,PT,EP,EFD
1/Croissant M4,PT,EP,EFD
2/Croissant M4,PT,EP,EFD
1/Navarre M4,PT,EP,EFD
2/Navarre M4,PT,EP,EFD
Grenadiers M4,PT,NE,SHK,EFD
Eu de Cologne M4,PT,EP,EFD
Bourbon et Branch M4,PT,EP,EFD

Explanations: M is morale (4); PT is Partly Trained; EP is Elites Present; NE is No Elites; EFD is Early Firelock Drill; SHK is Shock. All of these are V&B terms.

These were converted from a different set of rules, so that's why there will be 1/ and 2/ regiments.

Foreign Regiments of Saxe-Schweinrot

Regiments of the Isles in Saxe-Schweinrot Service:

Lt. Gen. Sir Percy Poundfoolish
The Foot
1st Brigade exh: 8
Lord Lovaduck's M4,PT,EP,BN blue distinctions
100-Acre Wood Frstrs M4,PT,EP,BN green distinctions
d'Escoigne-d'Escoigne M4,PT,EP,BN red distinctions
The Buffs M4,PT,EP,BN buff distinctions
Lord Rakehell's M4,PT,EP,BN orange distinctions
2nd Brigade exh: 6
Bartleshire Yeomanry M4,PT,EP,BN white distinctions
Lestrade's Rgt M4,PT,EP,BN yellow distinctions
McAlpin's Fusiliers M4,PT,NE fusil caps & yellow distinctions
H.M.O.R.L.EB.5th.Fus. M4,PT,EP,BN white coats with red distinctions
3rd Brigade exh: 1
Shropshire Rgt M4,PT,EP,BN light blue distinctions

A word about the above things. These are set up for Volley & Bayonet. M4 is morale 4, not the greatest. PT means partially trained - nobody maneuvers in step. It's too new-fashioned for Saxe-Schweinrot (or Ober-Bindlestiff). EP means there's a grenadier company present. NE means no elites (McAlpin's are also the Marines). BN means battalion artillery present. H.M.O.R.L.EB.5th Fus. is Her Majesty's Own Royal, Loyal, and Excessively Brave 5th Fusiliers.

Unit name origins:
Lord Lovaduck - a Marx brothers movie
100-acre woods foresters - Winnie the Pooh
d'Escoigne-d'Escoigne - A Tale of Two Cities
The Buffs - all units with buff facings are REQUIRED to be called the Buffs
Lord Rakehell's - from my wife's romance novels
Lestrade's - from Arthur Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes stories
McAlpin's Fusiliers - an Irish folk song about the navvies who built things in England
H.M.O.R.L.EB.5th.Fus. - a Hoka story
Shropshire Rgt - from a Daffy Duck/Porky Pig cartoon about the Shropshire Slasher!

The Horse
Household Brigade M6,HVY,SHK - blue cuffs
Buffs/Irish Mtd Fus. M5,HVY - buff/green facings
d’Escoigne M5,HVY - red facings

HVY means heavy cavalry, SHK means they get 'shock' in a melee.

Obviously the d'Escoigne regiment (on a VnB regimental stand) is the cadet branch of the family, hence only one "d'Escoigne".

There's also an artillery train of one light battalion of artillery.

Enemies & Rivals

After much debate, and a couple of successful mini-campaigns, I've decided I have no choice but to create an opponent for Ober-Bindlestiff. This will be the neighbor, of course, Saxe-Schweinrot, whose flag features a red pig.

The basis of Ober-Bindlestiff is a hotted up Saxony in our world. This means a lot of suggestiveness and innuendo about the pecadillos of the ruling family. So what would be the basis of Saxe-Schweinrot? Well, the other day, while pursuing customer service problems in the town of Snohomish, I happened to pass by the Barbecue Shack with their cavorting pigs. Now these pigs were the subject of controversy because they were clearly cartoon pigs, and they weren't wearing pants!!!!!!!! Oh shock and horror! They also didn't "fit in" with the "ambience" of 1st Street in Snohomish, which is full of antique stores (and bars).

So the basis of Saxe-Schweinrot will be...(wait for it)...food.

Specifically barbecue. Now I belong to a couple of discussion groups on the web, and I've observed that nothing gets people worked up so much as barbecue sauce. It isn't politics, it isn't religion, it isn't sex, it's barbecue sauce. Perhaps that's because you can discuss it online in public with children and those of hyper-sensitivity present. Suffice to say, Saxe-Schweinrot will be based on food (and food jokes). Expect a few from the Food Network, too.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
All right, what does this mean for my armies? Well, first, I can make the division between the Maritime Powers and the Continental Power. The latter, of course, is Ober-Bindlestiff, with it's French/Spanish flavor (my troops are Marlburian). That means my English and Dutch will now become the basis of Saxe-Schweinrot.

This won't be a coalition, though. Just a lot of troops "in service" to Saxe-Schweinrot. Think of the Low Countries and the English, as well as the Dutch habit of hiring troops (in part to keep them out of the Service of France).

More to come later!

Foreign Matters

Yes, foreign matters. In Ober-Bindlestiff the phrase 'foreign affairs' has quite another connotation entirely.

This announcement was just put forth by the Foreign Ministry:

"Yesterday, in a stunning rebuke of Franzonia, the Ministry of Fashion published a scathing review of the fashions paraded by several ladies of the court. Their dress and hair designers were ridiculed unmercifully, though the ladies were praised for putting up with wearing such trash. The taborets on their dresses were considered a finger-width too high for court wear, and several severe comments were made about the hemlines of their dresses rising so far as to only brush the floor. The Minister of Fashion allowed as how this was only to be expected of the designers to the Court, and expressed an earnest wish that in the future better designers more in tune with current fashion would be engaged."

This just in:

"The Minister of Fashion has deplored the bright shade of red on the heels of the shoes of dandies in the court of Saxe-Bearstein. However the Minister thought that if perhaps the ruler of Saxe-Bearstein were to not have such clean streets in his capitol, this would not be a problem. The Minister has directed that mud be offered (at cost!) to Saxe-Bearstein to help alleviate this problem."

Uniforms & Regiments of Ober-Bindlestiff

The basic uniform color is white, though sometimes undyed wool is provided instead. All equipment is natural leather, but the longer a soldier stays in the army, the darker the leather will be. Stockings are part of the uniform. The coat is not turned back, but the cuffs are. Button color is the same as the hat lace.

In some regiments the officers will have reversed colors, as will musicians (though with more lace). Non-commissioned officers uniforms will vary from those worn by commissioned officers in the fineness of the cloth, tin instead of silver, and brass instead of gold. White tape and yellow tape line the hats.

Distinctions are found in: hat lace/buttons, stockings, lining of coat, and the waistcoat. Some of the fancier regiments (richer Colonels) will have lacing on the waistcoat in the button color. The regiments from Yon Province will have chords on the left shoulder in the cuff color.

Now for some specifics:

Foreign regiments will all wear colored coats. Blue is popular for the ones from the rest of "Germany", while "Red" are either the Scottish Regiments, or the "Regiments of the Isles". By the way, the Elector thought they said the "Regiments of the Aisles", so by special decree from the Electoress (to avoid confusing her husband), those soldiers are allowed to be ushers at whatever entertainment that has been organized by the Army. The one "Russian" regiment wears green, though it has been likened to mildew rather than the more solid green.

Native regiments, with the exception of the Electoress's Personal Escort, the Gondolier Regiment, and the Mistress's Regiment, wear white.

The Gondolier Regiment wears white pants and are bare-chested (oil is provided to give their chests that "sheen" the women delight in so much. The men are barefoot (of course). Entrance to the Gondolier Regiment is by competitive singing. Each company sings in a different key. The men must be able to pilot a gondola while signing.

The Electoress's Personal Escort wear leather, and the fewer questions asked about them the better, save that they are very thoroughly disciplined.

The Mistress's Regiment wear "Electoral Red", sort of a faded red that has been likened to a muted Polish Crimson.

Officers of the Auditor General's Regiment wear black, though the men wear white. The musicians of this regiment wear red. The cuffs/stockings, and linings are red.

Artillerists wear blue with red trim for the field companies, and white for the fortress companies.

Cavalry obey the same rules for clothes as the foot, except that some of the native units wear dark blue instead of white.

Generals wear any damned thing they please, but those who belong to the Gondolier Regiment as well may not wear their Gondolier Regimentals while accompanying any other troops.

There are grenadiers, and they, for the most part, wear a little mitre, except those that wear a fur cap.

Pioneers wear aprons and carry axes, though it is rumored that there is a contingent of pioneers in the Mistress's Regiment that have lace on their aprons. This is not a subject that is best brought up in front of those men.

There is a mountain regiment, but nobody remembers what they wear. There is some suspicion it might be light gray, or white, or brown, or something like that.

There are two Dragoon regiments. One wears yellow, the other green.

There are no light troops in the army. When asked about light troops, the Marshal-General had everyone weighed, and determined that no one regiment was significantly lighter than any other.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Weaponry - the pike has been officially suppressed, so only a third of the army trails that noble weapon, and those units are not front line units. Everyone else in the Foot uses a fusil, except, of course, those units that use a matchlock. Horse relies upon swords, with each man carrying two pistols. Dragoons carry a carbine (as well as pistols), and have not only suppressed the pike, but discarded it as well!

Artillery carriages are painted in whatever color could be purchased in the depot city, which is why some are dark blue, and others are a dark red; all have dark iron fittings and bronze guns.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If we ever find the Navy we'll tell you what they wear.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Court versions of all of these uniforms are fancier with more braid and feathers. Rumor has it that the Electoress's Personal Escort's uniform while attending the Electoress in her private quarters is much less than what is seen in public, with only certain strategic places on their bodies being covered.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A complete listing of all uniforms by regiment was mislaid as recently as 30 years ago, so is probably incomplete. But if it is found, it should be illuminating.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
None of this covers the militia, though they all wear white (white coat, white breeches, white waistcoat, white stockings), and have hats that are not turned up in a tricorne. The militia do carry pikes. They generally have muskets, too.

King's War

This is the obligatory post about King's War, and is only indirectly related to Ober-Bindlestiff.

King's War is a set of pike & shot rules. It was originally written for the period 1660 to 1678, but was relevant to the closing stages of the Thirty Years War and the English Civil Wars. Later refinements now include Eastern Europe and the Turks, and go up to 1695.

A "unit" is a regiment/battalion of infantry, or a regiment of cavalry, or a gun battery. Foot includes shot, pikes, and those armed with melee weapons only. A typical regular foot unit is 12 shot and 6 pike on 6 stands of 3 each. A typical mounted unit is 3-4 stands of 3 each. Horse comes in cuirassier (3/4 armor and more), horse, lighter horse, and irregular horse. Dragoons in this period were a breed apart, often used on the fringes of the battlefield and in outpost work. They can dismount.

Units are grouped in brigades. Experience has shown that 2-3 regiments of mounted, or 3 regiments of foot make good, handy brigades. Turkish "brigades" are organized with 5-6 units, some mounted, some foot, some irregular horse, some "heavy" horse. Guns are either attached to the CiC, or to individual brigades.

King's War uses a card activation system. Each brigade has two cards. When a unit's card is drawn it can move and fight. When a unit gets into a melee, that is determined at the end of the turn. There is also a "Reshuffle" card in the deck that ends the turn (yes, it is possible for a unit to not move at all in a turn). The CiC (who has two cards of his own) can activate a nearby brigade. Thus it is possible for a brigade to move/fight at least three times in a single turn.

When a unit fires at an opposing unit, and hits it, that unit tests to see what it does. It is entirely possible for that unit to shoot back! The first unit, if hit, tests its reactions, and might shoot again! Thus we could have a nasty little firefight between a couple of units who lose sight of everything else around them as they hammer each other.

Hits are really disorders. If a unit accumulates enough disorders, it dissolves and flees from the field. Generals clear disorders. This is important because a unit with even one disorder on it cannot advance, and the disorders effect combat. My view is that a battlefield is a very disorderly place; it is very easy to get disordered, and takes time and trouble to straighten things out. By the way, there is no direct corelation between the number of casualties a unit has taken and disorder.

Movement - I like things simple, and I read accounts of battles where the generals and other officers went to a great deal of effort to make sure everyone moved at the same rate. The only ones who move faster are generals and cavalry charging. Everyone else moves 6" per turn.

Odds & Ends - Generals intercept their share of the metal in the atmosphere. When that happens, they roll to learn their fate. Be warned, you may get to gasp out some famous last words if a general is mortally wounded.

Melees are dealt with in the order in which they occurred, after the "Reshuffle" card is drawn.

There is a time limit on the game based on the number of cards played. Thus you don't quite know when the game is going to end. You may decide for some 'last turn heroics', only to find there is at least one more turn, and your units are hung out to dry.

The rules are available commercially. A local (for me) store is The Game Matrix in Tacoma, WA (well, Lakewood). Google them if you are interested in getting a copy of the rules. These are often played at local gaming conventions in the Pacific Northwest.

And before you ask, I've done testing of the system for later periods.

Personalities of Ober-Bindlestiff

Famous Personages

Hereditary Elector Karl Gustav Rurimondo Gaspode Klement Pavlovovich von Hither, XI (his mother was popular, and named him for every man who could have been his father—ironically, he doesn’t look like any of them). Commonly known as Karl XI. He is someone who enjoys a good time. Very conscious that he is the Elector, though he seldom stands on his dignity. He likes the jobs, especially the perks. He is fond of the palace wenches, most of who were chosen by Lucinda, his Senior Mistress, and are in her pay. If there is a party going on, he can usually be found at it. He likes to dance, and has been known to dance the night away.

Helga Matilda Marie Bridgitte von Hither, Electoress of Ober-Bindlestiff—known popularly as Electoress Marie. She is much given to thigh high leather boots, tight leather corsets, spiked heels and whips, all usually covered with black velvet (the fabric, not the drink, though she’s been known to cover herself with the drink from time to time and let her current suitor lick it up—well, she enjoys herself, and it’s a great honor for the young gentleman to be with her). She is referred to as “Mistress Marie” (though not to her face). The common joke in certain circles is that the Elector has two mistresses living in the palace. Not given to artificial beauty marks, she is petite, with soft blue-eyes, red-hair, and smooth, soft, porcelain like skin. She is originally from one of the more prominent families in Thither (Lucinda was her earliest and best friend, and still is, for that matter). She concerns herself with the domestic and economic well-being of the country (knowing more about money than most people in the country). She runs the palace with a “firm” hand (the palace staff is the most thoroughly disciplined palatial staff on the continent). She has been married to Karl ever since he was a young Erbprinz “with prospects”. She is considered quite charming by everyone who meets her at parties (especially the men), and has been known to flirt away an entire evening.
While she came by some of her recreational habits naturally, an earlier lover encouraged her interests in leather and some of the creative things that can be done with it. Her natural inclinations took her from there (much to the delight of most of the men in her life, especially her loving husband). She is the Colonel Proprietress of the Electoress’s Own Regiment of Horse, having auditioned and chosen the junior officers personally. She has inexhaustible endurance and imagination, and successful officer candidates must last the night with her, and still turn out in proper style for regimental parade the next morning.

Marshal General Stanley Bouffré—Commander of the Army. He is related to the famous Major General Stanley (Garrison Commander of Penzance in England) and Lord Stanley of Umbrage, Army Commander of Gottingen-Hoff. He is an enthusiastic amateur when it comes to music with, alas, a tin ear. As a result, the operas he stages are known for being loud rather than good. He has an on-going feud with most general contractors in the capitol as he keeps seeking to either add on to his opera house, or to build a new one. He is quite wealthy from having captured a baggage train almost single-handed during an earlier war, as well as having been gifted with various lands. When he’s not arguing with contractors, he is a student of the military classics, the earlier the better. When he was much younger he served under the famous General Count Raymondo Furioso. As a result, when faced with a military problem, he constantly asks what Count Furioso would do, then he tries to the exact opposite (which is probably why he is reasonably successful). He is married and spoils his wife tremendously (which she is not really aware of). He is one of the few senior people in the country who does not have a mistress (his lack of a mistress is considered an amusing eccentricity).

Count Rudolofo d’Extravaganza—Chancellor, Minister of Foreign Affairs (he is in charge of recruiting numerous mistresses for the nobility), and, incidentally, Governor of the Province of Yon. Of the Venetian Extravaganza’s, famed for his parties, his wit, and that he has a (very) distant claim on the throne as his family would inherit if something happened to the Elector’s family, something he is loathe to let happen as it would all be such a terrible bother. He is an elderly gentleman much given to writing bad love sonnets to his two mistresses. He plays the violin wretchedly but enthusiastically. He was chosen for his post, in part because of his diplomatic ability, and in part to give him something to do (otherwise, who knows what kind of mischief he might get up to). He is a tall, thin man with a balding head, a prominent Adams apple, and a taste for imported brandy. He gives an air of being amused by the world around him...generally, and is perceived by most people as a kindly man. He can also flay the skin from a subordinate’s back with a few well-chosen words, and hides a ferocious and impatient temper. In earlier years he served in a variety of diplomatic missions, from which he grew quite wealthy (he sold trading licenses to blockade runners in a previous war). He is the Colonel-Proprietor of Infantry Regiment Procurer-General.

Marquis Viscoso d'Serpente, Governor of the Province of Thither. He is a very private person, interestingly enough, he is a bit of an ascetic. He dresses in dull clothes, lives in a dull house filled with dull paintings, along with a dull wife and several dull children. His only hobby is peculation. He loves to play cards, having graduated from the University of Bindlestiff with a degree in Three Card Monte. He is the only senior member of the government who does not own a regiment.

Admiral Lord Sitandwait—Admiral General of the Navy (or what there is of it, we have one around here somewhere...don’t we? I thought I saw it last week, or year, or something) and Colonel in Chief of the Gondolier Regiment (he is a baritone).

Countess Lucinda Esmerelda Obrigata, Free Proprietress of Thither—Senior Mistress of the Elector. Known as Lucinda, or, to her friends, ‘Cinda. Never as Lu or Luci (or, worse, Luci-Duci)—the last to call her that was given the honor of leading an escalade of a fortress while in foreign service. She is the Colonel-Proprietress of Infantry Regiment Saint Jezebel. She is a lifelong friend of the Electoress, they grew up and went to school together in Thither province, and the story goes the Elector could not choose between them, so he chose both. Her official duties include providing the back-up heir in case the Electoress does not. She is also the official head of the Electoral House of Fashion, and as such helps design all the latest fashions. Scandalmongers have stopped whispering about her as she openly admitted that not only were all of the stories probably true, but they didn't know the really juicy ones. She is enthusiastic in practicing her duties, and is reputed to hand-pick all of the officers of her regiment. She is also in charge of all of the other mistresses, her office administering their incomes. She is a lush, dark-haired beauty, voluptuous in the Italian sense, though without the hips. She is much given to dressing in the daring peasant style, though she certainly likes her silks.


The Government

The government of Ober-Bindlestiff is comprised of three parts: the Privy Cabinet, the Select Cabinet, and the General Cabinet.

The General Cabinet is composed of delegates from each province (appointed by the Governor of that province and numbering 10 in number) who “advise” the Elector on matters concerning their own province. The Elector (sometimes) heeds their advice.

The Select Cabinet is composed of the Heads of the Departments of the Government: Foreign Affairs, Postal, Cultural and the Exchequer. They have the same power any Permanent Undersecretary has (which is to say, quite a lot).

The Privy Cabinet is composed of the members of the Government that the Elector wants to see at any given time. There is no standing membership in this Cabinet, except for the Exchequer.

Independent of these are, of course, the Army and the Navy. Administration of the Army is left in the capable hands of Marshal General Stanley, while Admiral Sitandwait manages the Navy (or at least he says he does). If someone can find our Navy, please send a post to "The Navy Society, The Palace, Ober-Bindlestiff". Please include a SASE for any reply that is made. Do NOT send it postage due as this will assuredly invite a hostile audit by the Auditor General of the Army.